I thought I woke up in hell, facing the prospects of a work-filled, broke and sober St. Patrick Day.
It was pathetic enough to have good baseball news from saving the day. Like, I dunno, Kendrys Morales agreeing to a two-year $20 million deal to play for the Pittsburgh Pirates. Or Stephen Drew agreeing to a $15 million, one-year deal with the Tigers.
Shit like that kind of brightens up your day. The picture is looking complete.
And then this.
Jarrod Parker will miss the entire season and will undergo elbow reconstruction surgery, a dread that’s been building up all weekend. A.J. Griffin might be in trouble, too, and could be headed Parker’s way as I type these words.
Shit. Fuck. Cock and balls.
The A’s announcement on Parker’s near future came the day after the Arizona Diamondbacks confirmed that starting pitcher Patrick Corbin will have the Tommy John procedure.
Just do it to me sideways.
The best and brightest young pitchers, future Cy Young types or close to it — have gone down.
They’re calling it an epidemic, thought I’m not sure I’d agree to it or not. Give me time to process that. Lots of data, but I’ll go over the skeptic’s check list — anomalies happen and this could be it; normalizing the data to reflect a couple of points — is the procedure common for the ages of 21 to 26, and is there currently more ages 21- to 26-year-olds logging close to 200 big league innings while keeping their ERAs below 4.00.
We talk about a Golden Age of pitching, and it’s easy to process that when you’ve got Jose Fernandez, Matt Harvey, Michael Wacha et. al. blowing up just one league. It’s like Verlander and King Felix multiplied like gremlins. Well, they’re dying like Gremlins, too. En masse, like lemmings do.